Separate narrator and thinking
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2026-06-18 20:50:52 +02:00
parent 7fc93b1a9c
commit c18cd4eead
+14 -15
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@@ -1,8 +1,9 @@
# The Iron Hollow — Chapter 1 PoC
# Scene 2: Sara Arrives
define sara = Character("Sara", color="#c8a882")
define luno = Character("Luno", color="#82b4c8")
define sara = Character("Sara", color="#5acbd5")
define thinking = Character("Sara", color="#1d9fa4", what_italic=True)
define luno = Character("Luno", color="#1b449d")
define narrator = Character(None)
# ── Persistent flags ──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────
@@ -10,8 +11,6 @@ default checkpoint_set = False
default rewind_used = False
default purpose_chosen = False
default silence_chosen = False # here Sara learns that Luno asks everyone the same question
default timer_left = 20
default timer_max = 20
# ── Entry point ───────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────
label start:
@@ -19,25 +18,26 @@ label start:
with fade
"The Iron Hollow training yard sits inside a converted warehouse district. Stone walls, packed dirt, the smell of old metal and new sweat."
"Sara takes it all in before she steps through the gate."
thinking "So this is where the Iron Hollow has its base."
show sara neutral at left
with easeinright
"Two people are already here. A boy against the far wall, watching nothing. And a girl near the gate — moving like she already belongs."
thinking "Two others have arrived already. The boy over there is seems to know where to go, maybe I should ask him."
thinking "Looks like the other one noticed me."
show luno curious at right
with easeinright
"The girl notices Sara first."
jump luno_greeting
label luno_greeting:
luno "You're here for the recruitment?"
sara "Yes. Where do I register?"
luno "The man over at that table takes your name. Then we wait."
thinking "Seems like she told him where to go."
luno "I'm Luno. Been here a few days already — helping with the wounded from last month's job. I know how things run here if you need anything."
"She doesn't say it like an offer. She says it like she's already taking notes."
thinking "That's a strong question right away."
luno "So. Money, glory, or are you just bored?"
jump choice_screen
@@ -60,7 +60,7 @@ label rewind_choice:
with dissolve
show sara neutral at left
show luno curious at right
"Sara is standing at the choice again. Luno's question still in the air."
thinking "Let's try this again."
jump choice_screen
"[[ Continue ]":
hide screen rewind_prompt
@@ -75,7 +75,6 @@ label choice_screen:
scene black
with dissolve
"A flash. Sara's hand, signing something. A contract. The ink is red."
"It could mean anything."
scene bg training_yard
with dissolve
show sara neutral at left
@@ -113,13 +112,13 @@ label branch_money:
label branch_money_post_rewind:
sara "Same reason as everyone else."
luno "Sure."
"Unremarkable. Fine."
thinking "Unremarkable. Fine."
"But when Sara finishes speaking, Luno's eyes linger — just a half-second longer than they should."
show luno linger at right
"Not suspicion. Not quite. More like the feeling of reaching for something that moved."
show luno neutral at right
"She shakes it off. Probably nothing."
"Sara knows it wasn't nothing."
thinking "Probably nothing."
"But it wasn't nothing."
jump rewind_choice
label branch_purpose:
@@ -134,11 +133,11 @@ label branch_purpose:
luno "The clothes suggest a script."
show sara pained at left
sara "The script didn't survive."
"She doesn't mean to say it. Too true. Too fast. Too much."
thinking "I said too much. I can't already give this much information to a stranger."
"She can feel it land — can feel Luno actually {i}looking{/i} at her now, not just watching."
show luno soft at right
luno "...Yeah. I know that feeling."
"Sara can step back. Give the safer answer. Luno will never know what she almost said."
thinking "I should go back. Give the safer answer. She shouldn't know what I almost said."
jump rewind_choice
label branch_silence: